


i know i've kissed you before

by agentmaine



Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: 5 Things, Canon Compliant, First Kiss, Fluff, M/M, Song Inspired, mitski thank you for your work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-04
Updated: 2020-04-04
Packaged: 2021-02-28 19:46:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,630
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23482633
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/agentmaine/pseuds/agentmaine
Summary: but i didn't do it rightcan i try again, try again, try againtry again, and again, and againand again, and again, and again?- 5 times taako and kravitz have kissed, out of many.
Relationships: Kravitz/Taako (The Adventure Zone)
Comments: 9
Kudos: 89





	i know i've kissed you before

1.

The first time Taako kisses Kravitz, it isn’t good. It’s a blur of a decision, an impulse choice made in the moment - as many of Taako’s best and worst decisions often are. A grabbing hand at Kravitz’s black jacket as he was halfway through a rift, material soft to the touch, a clumsy pull, a clumsier turn, a rush of momentum spurring Taako forward onto the tips of his toes, warm lips pressing to cold ones at an angle not at all right, completely new, awkward, taking Kravitz by surprise in a much less romantic way than he had envisioned.

It isn’t  _ good _ , but it’s perfect.

As their lips connect, Kravitz engages in the gymnastic routine of trying to turn around fully, half stumbling back into the vicinity of the bureau’s courtyard, a mess of limbs as he drops the scythe he was holding mere moments ago, puts his hands on the small of Taako’s back, as tentatively as the press of their lips. Taako grows in confidence, a swelling feeling, like being pulled upwards, and snakes his arms around Kravitz’s neck, tilting his head and parting his mouth ever-so-slightly, the kiss moving from an awkward press to the process of figuring out how they fit together. It isn’t as though Taako’s unfamiliar with Kravitz’s lips, he’d spent  _ more  _ than enough time looking at them, often without any attempts at subtlety; in fact, quite often hoping Kravitz would see and take some initiative for once, for Pan’s sake. But he hadn’t, and if you want a job doing, do it yourself, Taako had come to reason. But, no - it wasn’t that he was unfamiliar with Kravitz’s lips, he was simply adjusting to the reality that he could  _ do  _ this, that his lips could cross that distance, that they could melt from two people to one.

Kravitz moves back first and although the reaper can’t blush - he’s fucking  _ cold _ , always so cold - he was not free from the reigns of being awe-struck, apparently. A wicked grin plays on Taako’s lips like a dance and the thudding of his heart, suddenly apparent, could potentially be an earthquake. 

“That…” Kravitz begins, breathless.

“Not my best performance, I won’t lie, homeslice.” Taako interrupts, surprised to find his own voice coming out as a hushed whisper, feeling a blush spread further across his face. “Your fault for trying to leave our, uh,  _ third fucking date _ without laying one on me.”

“I- I, Taako, gods. I didn’t want to  _ presume _ .” He practically sounds pleading, his embarrassment slowly melting into a deep chuckle as he moves his hands to Taako’s hips, fingers brushing across the material lightly, a tentative hold. “I didn’t want to presume,” he repeated, expression shifting into the softest of smiles. “Because I care about doing this right, Taako.”

“Oh.” A blink, once, twice. A raised eyebrow. “As in,  _ us _ , this?”

“No,” Kravitz chuckles again, low in his chest. “I’m passionate about pottery, obviously. I put in time off with my boss, the Raven Queen, pause collecting souls, ignore my sworn duty as a bounty hunter to spend time with someone I should  _ really  _ be hunting down… because I am passionate about the  _ pottery.” _

Taako laughs, head thrown back slightly, the sound bellowing in altering pitches across the empty courtyard. “You’re the universe’s biggest asshole, you know that, right? Stop spending time with me. I don’t like getting what I give.”

“Mhm, I’ll just re-open that rift then, shall I?”

“Don’t you fuckin’ dare, I have a reputation to get back. Come here.” At that, Taako swells upwards again, meeting Kravitz halfway as he leans into the kiss - their second, Taako thinks, bursting with a joy that he wishes was smug, but it’s just…  _ happy _ . The confidence grows, this time, a more assured contact, a tighter hold of the hips, one of Taako’s hands holding the back of Kravitz’s head lightly. A slight parting of the mouth, a brush of tongue against his lower lip that makes Taako  _ purr _ , a smile in response to the sound and all of a sudden they’re both in a light fit of giggles, the kiss fading into shared laughter, a gentle press of foreheads.

Only the sound of an angry stone of farspeech and the rustling leaves, a chilling breeze, brings Taako back to where he is, makes him a person once more, rather than allowing him to live in that moment. He grunts unhappily, looking at Kravitz. “That your curfew?”

“Sadly.” Kravitz nods, face adorned once again with that soft smile. “I'll be back soon, though.”

“You better be.” Taako attempts to cut back, a joke of a threat. Instead, it comes out worryingly  _ vulnerable _ , a tone playing on his tongue that he’s all too unfamiliar with, scared of, and somehow, under it all, happy to hear. Reminding him he’s a person, that everything happening isn’t changing him, he’s still able to feel this, to have this. He clears his throat, attempting to gather some bravado, despite it all. “I’m a reclaimer, remember. I’ll hunt your ass down if you try to ghost me.”

“I wouldn’t dream of it.” Kravitz presses a soft kiss to Taako’s forehead, heart-stoppingly tender. In a moment of dichotomy that would be hilarious if Taako wasn’t still reeling from the affection, Kravitz picks up his scythe, the immaculate silver of the large blade glinting as it’s caught in the light. In one swift motion, Kravitz steps back and cuts a rift in the fabric of the world, at once a reminder to Taako that the man he’s rapidly becoming more involved with is as powerful as he is gentle. A new chill passes through the air, spilling out from wherever it is that Kravitz is headed. As he turns to enter the rift, he looks back, stealing one more glance towards Taako with that gentle smile present on his face. “I’ll miss you. Stay safe, love.”

In a moment quicker than comprehension, Kravitz is gone, a shift of cloak and bone and a ripping sound, once more, as the fabric of the world reseals itself around him.

“Jeez,” Taako says aloud to no one at all. “ _ Fuck _ .”

2.

When Taako kisses Kravitz in front of others for the first time, it is nothing short of the best and the fucking  _ worst.  _ It’s Candlenights and everyone is there,  _ everyone _ , the whole Moon Base in one place and Taako is hit with the staggering realisation that people outside of his inner circle really do exist, that they’re everywhere, that each individual action he makes may be impacting these people more than he can even begin to comprehend. He thinks of the voidfish in it’s tank, dazzling purple, singing it’s lonely song. Thinks of everyone here -  _ so many fucking people -  _ and thinks of all of their stories, feeding it.

_ Fucking weird, terrifying and bad _ , he thinks, and makes the firm decision not to dwell on it anymore, not one bit. He has to trust that the decisions he makes are the right ones and, hell, he’s alive so far, so something must be going according to plan.

The mass of people mingling in the grand hall of the base is not only terrifying to him, but to his date. Kravitz stands and observes with a nervous trepidation of the new kid at school, not wanting to make himself known for fear of rejection. His hands are  _ clammy _ , somehow, as Taako holds one in his own casually, and he realises somewhere in the back-left corner of his mind that Kravitz must  _ really  _ be scared, if his not-dead not-alive form is having a real reaction to this.

Get yourself a 400 year old grim reaper who collects souls as a job and also has  _ social anxiety,  _ apparently, Taako thinks to himself and manages to hold back a laugh. He doesn’t do the best at  _ words _ and he is lucky in the fact that Kravitz knows this, and so a strong squeeze of the hand is enough.

“You wanna come meet my asshole coworkers?” Taako asks, as soft and inviting as he can make it.

“You… You know you’ve called them your family who you love dearly to me before, yes?” Kravitz asks.

“Yes, but you tell ‘em that, and I’ll kill you. I don’t care that you  _ can’t die _ and  _ that’s not how it works, Taako,”  _ He says, mimicking Kravitz’s work-accent. “I’ll fuckin’ do it. One shot.” It’s only half a joke. Kravitz understands, laughs, smiles.

“I’d love to, Taako.” A beat of silence. “I am frankly fucking terrified, though. Especially to meet Angus.”

“Pft, don’t stress, homie. The kid is easy to please - look, he likes  _ me. _ ” He smiles, holding Kravitz’s hand tighter as he begins to retreat from the sidelines, worming his way through countless bureau employees, towards the crowding of people around Lucretia and the others he’s closest to. Meets a strange realisation that they are, essentially,  _ office celebrities _ . Tries to ignore the eyes burning into him, the awfully appreciative recognition from employees he couldn’t even attempt to identify, all looking up to  _ him _ .

Though, he’s not sure if that’s worse, or if it’s the look of pure joy and admiration on Angus’ face as he barrels over to him at a hundred miles an hour, stopping just at their feet. Taako notices Kravitz blink down at the small boy as if assessing an alien species as Angus chimes a cheerful, “Hello Sirs!”

Taako smiles at the good start. “You must be Mr. Kravitz! I’ve heard so much about you - Taako talks about you  _ all  _ the time, like, a large amount! I feel like I already know you! And --”

Taako clamps a mage hand over Angus’ mouth and feels, immediately, the loss of his control over the situation, as a blush spreads across his cheeks and Killian immediately notices, finding it fit to announce to the crowd.

It would be  _ awful _ , he thinks, if not for the laugh it draws from Kravitz, the swelling of his chest, the unmistakable pride emanating from him.

Not that he would let anyone know that, of course, he has an image to maintain. So he scowls and tells everyone to  _ fuck off _ , sharp in sound but blunted at the edges, like pulling a punch.

It’s hours later at the coming of dusk when they have moved from the rooms of crowds to Lucretia’s private office, festively decorated in a relaxed way that Taako didn’t expect from her, this open softness. It might be the holiday season, of course, or the helping hand of a few glasses of mulled wine. Though, seeing the empty plate of macaroons is nice, too, filling him with a slight, muted pride.

They chat in little groups, Kravitz mingling with grace and expertise and none of the anxiety of a few hours ago, judging by the creases by his eyes that show Taako that his wonderful smile is  _ real _ , making it all the more wonderful. Taako wonders when he ever got so  _ soft. _

They’re in the midst of a conversation with Merle and Angus, listening to the young boy - up past his bedtime, in pyjamas, no less - talk about the latest Caleb Kid WhateverTheFuck book, Taako paying subtle attention to the fatherly attentiveness adorning Merle’s expression, a side of him he keeps hidden, as if he’s scared to break it. That’s when they’re interrupted by cheering (of course, because not one conversation can be completed calmly in this place), spear-headed by Magnus’ overly loud whooping.

Taako turns and sees Carey and Killian embraced in what is as much laughter as it is a kiss, with mistletoe hanging above them.

At once, Kravitz catches his eyes and they both shake their heads at each other furiously, wide-eyed determination to not be  _ that couple,  _ Taako knowing damned well that Carey and Killian edge into the territory in which that behaviour is  _ sweet _ , not mortifying.

Equally at once, Magnus, drunk on alcohol and the warm joy of time with his newfound family, marches over to them and starts ushering them towards the hanging berries.

“Fuck. OFF. Mango.” Taako threatens with unintentional laughter behind his words, attempting to dig his heels into the floor. Unsurprisingly uneffective next to his burling best friend, and Kravitz, Taako noticies, is not trying anywhere near as hard as he expected to avoid kissing him.

_ Oh, _ comes the realisation, fluttering in his chest like the scattering of birds,  _ he’s not ashamed of me. _

He continues to fight, or, “ _ fight _ ”, against Magnus until they stop under the target and Magnus steps back, grinning like an artist admiring his work. “Get smoochin’, love birds!”

“Never fucking speak to me again, Burnsides, I’ll shave your damn face.” Taako turns to look up at Kravitz, whose eyes are shining with unbridled affection. He drops his voice in volume, gentle. “We doing this?”

Kravitz takes his response in the form of cupping Taako’s face softly, leaning down into a chaste, gentle kiss that leaves Taako weak in the knees, using his umbrastaff in his left hand to stop himself from falling in the physical sense, already certain that the metaphorical is far too gone to avoid. His right hand rests on Kravitz’s side, gripping the fabric of his shirt softly, cementing him. In the moment, he focuses only on the feeling of Kravitz against him, how soft his lips are, the press of his nose against Taako’s face, the feeling of his hand on his jaw, as gentle as it is encompassing, holding,  _ protective _ in a way that Taako doesn’t quite understand, doesn’t know how to process or rationalise.

The cheers from his coworkers, mixed in with the over-exaggerated  _ ewwww _ from Magnus and Merle, are nothing but white noise.

3.

On a rare weekend in which they’ve been allowed time together, Taako does almost nothing  _ but  _ kiss Kravitz. Words still don’t come easy, but they do come, sometimes. Kravitz would be stupid not to know that he is loved, achingly so, but that one hasn’t been said, not yet. The  _ love  _ comes in the form of insults, in food cooked expertly, in sticky notes attached to scythe’s telling him he has to be safe.

Right now, it comes in the form of Taako kneeling over his lap, facing towards him, his hands cupping Kravitz’s face as he kisses the not-life-nor-death out of him, slow and lazy and languid and remarkably comfortable, like a return to home. His hands run over Kravitz’s skin, taking him in slowly, wherever he can reach - nape of his neck, the curve of his jaw, the strong shoulders moving down to stronger arms, over his back and down to his sides. He’s  _ warm _ , Taako realises, and refuses to over-analyse the implications of that. Not now, at least.

He presses closer, impossibly, chest to chest with Kravitz, pushing the man back into the mountainous pile of pillows and blankets adorning his bed, pulling Kravitz’s soft lower lip between his own, a gentle, teasing bite that draws a happy little noise of want from Kravitz, which Taako proudly notes is reminiscent of what has been done between them before and what, undoubtedly, is likely to come again soon.

_ Come again _ , he repeats in his mind, and Taako has to stop himself from laughing at that. Of course, as always his own Icarus to the metaphorical Comedy Sun, he fails, composure collapsing into a snorting laugh right into Kravitz’s mouth.

Kravitz, much to his credit, takes it in his stride, wrapping his arms around Taako’s back further, opening his eyes with an inquisitive smile, looking up at Taako with an indescribable look of… of something Taako isn’t ready to say, yet. “Something funny, love?”

“Nothing.” Taako giggles further as he sits up slightly more, looking down at Kravitz from his vantage position with a tittering of laughter. “I thought of a sex joke.”

“Ah,” Kravitz says, as if the situation is in any way reasonable or to be expected. Then again, maybe it is, and that gives Taako something to think about, maybe reassess about himself. “Of course.”

Taako’s hands run over Kravitz’s bare chest lightly, humming as he does so, absent-minded in the way that he notices Magnus does when carving his little ducks. Absent-minded in the sense of doing something calming, something that has become second nature. Kravitz only smiles in response, his chest rising and falling with a contented sigh, one that (once again, Taako notes with unending smugness) is unnecessary for a being that doesn’t breathe.

To make someone without the need for air  _ choose  _ to breathe, if only to allow himself to become breathless again is something Taako reckons he has every right to be proud of.

“Y’know,” Taako muses, pausing his wandering hands to release the claw clip holding up his mass of blonde curls, sending them tumbling down his back again. “I think we should petition the big ol’ RQ to let us do this more often.”

“Mhm,” Kravitz hums in definitive agreement, his hands tracing Taako’s sides in a way that makes the elf squirm slightly. “Though I imagine Lucretia wouldn’t be too happy to have one of her world-savers off every weekend.”

“Fuck her, fuck the lot of them.” Taako announces solidly, all the while knowing he isn’t convincing anyone. His shoulders droop slightly, along with his ears, as always horrendously in tune to how he feels, a flashing sign of hurt he wishes would stay out of sight. “I don’t mean that. Fucking... like, obviously I don’t.”

A pause, giving Kravitz the opportunity to move the conversation along, hurry him towards being  _ fun  _ again. Taako is shocked for the infinite time that all Kravitz does is listen, sitting himself up once more, resting against the bed frame. That unhidden care, the open ears, the ready listener. It’s not sunken in, yet. Taako perseveres, lest his emotions take over.

“I wish I could fuck this all off, though. I would, if I didn’t care about them, you know?” Taako mumbles, looking to the side, feeling awfully like this is some sort of religious confession of sins. “I… I look after what I care about, right? And I’d fuck all of this to the Astral Plane and back, if I could guarantee the people I love are safe.”

Without having to say it in precise words, this is a confession, even if Taako doesn’t realise it. Kravitz, of course, recognises the weight of the situation, and as always, acts as a heavy lifter to alleviate some of it for Taako in a way that the elf often forgets he needs. “Don’t put it in the Astral Plane,” he says, “I live there.”

A smile returns to Taako’s face, accompanied by a breathy laugh. “Okay, some other plane. You know what I mean, though?”

“I think so, dear.” Kravitz, wordlessly, guides Taako into a hug, letting him bury his face into Kravitz’s neck, the blonde hair unruly and tickling his skin lightly. “But you staying is the right choice, and I’m proud of you. Thank you, Taako.”

“Why?” Taako mumbles, pressing a kiss to the soft skin of Kravitz’s neck.

“Because I know who you do this for.” He pauses, calculating the words precariously to sidestep the obvious while allowing the sentiment to remain in tact, ever so carefully making sure to stay in the lines that Taako has set out silently. “And I know why you do it.”

“You do?” Taako is sure that Kravitz’s own heart could be restarted through the reverberations of Taako’s beating through his chest.

“I do. And I’d do the same for you, if I was ever given the opportunity.” He says it solidly, like a promise.

Taako isn’t good at words, so he looks up, takes in the sight of his beloved, kisses him for every bit of worth he sees in him, every bit of that word he can’t say, every hope he has for them.

It gets the point across.

4.

Taako has always known he performs at his best when he’s under pressure, so really, it makes sense that his best kiss comes at the almost end of the world, very shortly after learning about, oh,  _ one hundred years of his life he’d missed, his twin sister, the end of the fucking world being at his doorstep, ETC.  _

It makes sense, if you squint.

Taako is reunited with Kravitz at the potential end of days, the scariest and most overwhelming day of his life and it’s nowhere near over, he is exhausted and in pain and terrified and there he is,  _ Kravitz _ , a beacon of hope through it all.

There is less of a decision made to kiss Kravitz as there is a driving force, stronger than the gods above, stronger than almost anything he’s ever felt in his life, as he runs into the arms of the man he loves - yes,  _ loves _ , he can say it now, he might not ever get another chance - ignoring his awkward, adorable, perfect worries of it being weird and kissing him as if it’s their last chance.

Because, he realises, with a stomach-punch of fear, it might be.

They connect like the crashing of waves and with that terrifying thought lodged into his consciousness, he puts all pride aside and kisses with unabashed desperation and love, letting himself be lifted into the air by those wonderfully familiar, strong, protective arms, spun around as he is kissed as if he’s in a romance movie, letting the reality of this love sink in, letting himself accept the fact that in one day he has been given back the two greatest loves of his life that he didn’t even know were missing.

He was missing out, all of this time, every kiss since the first, every moment he hadn’t spent telling Kravitz how loved he is, how much  _ he  _ loves him, how much he doesn’t want this to end,  _ fuck  _ his pride.

(Even as he thinks this, there’s a lump in his throat. Fear won’t go away overnight, but he’s never wanted to work on it more than in this moment.)

Kravitz puts him down on the ground, as gentle as if he is made of glass, as if he could break. There are tears welling in those gorgeous brown eyes that Taako wants to keep safe from all of this, the beating of his pulse echoing in his ears against the sounds of battle in the distance.

He tries to say I love you. It comes out as him dropping his glamour, exposing the dirtied hair, the scarred skin, the tired eyes. “I just wanted to know if this changes anything, for you.”

Internally, Taako curses himself. Externally, he grips onto Kravitz’s arms tighter, hard enough to leave a mark, even through clothes. He would feel a pang of guilt about that, if not for Kravitz’s own hands holding him just the same.

“Taako,” Kravitz begins, and it sounds like the words are practically choked out as he holds back tears. “I was crazy about you before some  _ weird light  _ told me a story about your hundred year journey through existence where you were fighting for a century to save the world..” He laughs slightly, as bewildered as Taako feels, and Taako feels the sting of tears behind his own eyes.

“I love you, Taako, and at this point I think everyone in reality is going to love you, after hearing your story. And… nothing is going to change that.” Kravitz finishes speaking with a beaming smile despite it all, despite everything they’ve been through, despite the shadows looming over them, he looks blissfully joyful.

Taako tries again to say how he feels. Fails, again, laughing out a “that was a test, your face is a skull half the time.”

Kravitz seems to get the message, laughing with a wince - Taako registers he’s in pain, aches to be able to help him, but there are bigger fish to fry.

They exchange words, quick, hushed, promises that they’ll get back to each other as soon as this is over, a grounding statement that Taako clings to like a lifeboat, repeating it like a favourite record, a monk’s chant, a hymn. He needs it to be true, he needs to know that they will both make it through this, the darkest of days.

But dark comes with light, doesn’t it? The darkest of days, the day Kravitz ( _ his _ Kravitz, a previously unknown possessiveness rings in his chest like an echo) told his love for him. 

Kravitz goes to open a rift, that larger than life scythe materialising in his hand and cutting through the air once more.

Instinctively, Taako stops him, a hand grabbing him by the arm. “Wait -- shit, stop, hold off the end of the… shit, the everything, I guess, for like  _ one  _ more minute.” He clears his throat, staring at Kravitz, dumbstruck, while Kravitz looks back. Patient, knowing, warm,  _ home.  _ “Krav?”

“Yes?” He says it soft, sweet, like a lullaby.

“I love you too.” The words should feel groundbreaking, but it’s… not a confession. That confession came months ago, in kisses and breakfasts and in meeting Angus, being allowed into the young boy’s life. It came in roses at Kravitz’s bedside table, delivered from Istus, to the Raven Queen, to her favourite bounty hunter. It came in letting Kravitz see him cry, in morning vulnerability, in shared nights. It came in the truth of him, the real him, the hidden, sheltered man that he can be, the fear, the nightmares. It came in the unspoken, the spoken, the known.

Kravitz has known Taako has loved him for months, Taako realises, and feels quite stupid. Kravit has known Taako has loved him for months, Taako reiterates to himself, and feels an overwhelming sense of relief that he didn’t have to make it a whole  _ first time  _ thing on this day, of all days.

It was just as good an opportunity to say it now, he realises, as it would be over coffee on a Sunday afternoon. Kravitz doesn’t love him because the world might be ending, Kravitz just… loves him.

He loves him, and happened to say it today. Because today, Taako needed to hear it more than before, more than either of them could possibly know.

“Oh, WAIT, shit, one more thing-” Taako says, that familiar wicked grin playing at his lips. He couldn’t just have one announcement - good things can come in twos, he thinks, if bad things have to come in threes. “This is my twin sister, Lup.”

In a twirling flame, Lup appears, the lich’s grin matching his own and both only growing in a uniform laughter at Kravitz’s beyond gob-smacked expression. “What’s up, ghost rider?”

5.

When the world is in less immediate danger, when Taako is a certified hero (a term that never fits right, a shirt a size too small), when the pieces are beginning to be put back together, the old and the new figuring out where they fit together like new lovers’ first dances, Taako takes his time to kiss Kravtiz again, and again, and again, and again.

After all, they have the two most important ingredients in the world, more dear to Taako than any recipe, no matter how tried and tested they had been prior: they have time, and they have each other.

Taako takes the opportunity to kiss Kravitz right, because there’s always room for improvement, and because he still has to make up for his first performance. He takes every opportunity to let Kravitz know how much he loves him, too - in words, now that he’s able to. And now that he’s able to, he doesn’t plan on stopping that, not now, not ever.

He takes the lesson that good things come to those who wait - and they’ve waited long enough.

**Author's Note:**

> this is inspired by pink in the night by mitski, and by me being incapable of writing literally anything other than taakitz. still. holy shit griffin ya got me good. this ones for you, fellow mitski lgbts.


End file.
